Thanksgiving Aftermath
November 25, 2005. Friday, 9:51pm.
Electricity is out on the school compound until at least Monday. My neighbor the headmaster told me they forgot to pay the bill. I had the paraffin lamp going for a few hours but it has gotten too cold to leave the windows cracked to prevent carbon monoxide poisoning, so I am lighting my house with my laptop screen.
Well Thanksgiving dinner was a great success and I made enough food to feed everyone I invited, as well as random party crashers and 12 extra kids and housekeepers. We weren’t able to locate a suitable turkey--they’re few and far between in my village and the guy who had one was asking 2500 Ksh for it--so we got two chickens instead, after running around for ten minutes chasing them. I took them aside and said, “Hey buds, I hope you speak English because I don’t know how to say this in Kiswahili. You know, God put you on this earth to be food, so I want to thank you for sacrificing your life for our Thanksgiving dinner. Hillary is good at slaughtering chickens; he’ll be quick and you won’t feel a thing, and I know you’ll taste great, so thank you.” They were Kenyan chickens so I figured they would probably get the God reference. And I didn’t let them down; Hillary was done in five minutes and they were both delicious. The stuffing was also a surprise hit, and everyone was baffled by the idea that you can make pie from a pumpkin.
Menu: butter-herb roasted chickens (2), green beans and carrot julienne in garlic herb vinaigrette, garlic mashed potatoes, autumn spice sweet potatoes, Carolina cole slaw (which I forgot to serve because there was already so much food), Mom’s avocado tomato salad, turkey stuffing sans turkey, chicken giblet gravy, pumpkin pie, no-bake chocolate cookies (Peace Corps recipe).
Speaking of Peace Corps recipes, I found a recipe in the Peace Corps cookbook for making cheese. It says to boil milk with a small piece of cow stomach before aging. It sounded simple enough, until I was told that cows have four stomachs. Now I don’t know which stomach to ask for at the butcher’s, or if it even matters. (On top of that, I always thought that cows had seven stomachs.)
Well as you’ve probably heard, the constitutional referendum went off peacefully and the No/Orange team won by a 15% margin. People say that despite having been conducted peacefully, the referendum has divided the country along tribal lines. President Kibaki, who led the Yes/Banana camp, gracefully conceded victory to his opponents with a big scowl on his face, and the same evening announced that ‘in order to restore cohesiveness’ in his government, he was dissolving his Cabinet, which used to be composed of people from different tribes. A lot of Kenyans suspect the new lineup will be composed mainly of members of his tribe, the Kikuyus, one of the few tribes that voted overwhelmingly for Yes. Campaign rhetoric leading up to the November 21 vote got nasty, with politicians calling each other uncircumcised boys, Satan, and mavu ya kuku (chicken shit). Yes leaders took cheap shots at tribes who supported the No team, and vice versa. One MP from the Yes side described Luos, most of whom supported the No team, as people who ‘hate us because we’re hard-working. Luos just go fishing, and fish is free, and then they ask the government for relief maize to make ugali.’ And pre-referendum clashes tended to occur in towns where tribes who supported opposing teams lived together. In Eldoret there were clashes between Kalenjins (No) and Kikuyus (Yes), while to the east in Burnt Forest there were clashes between Kalenjins (No) and Luhyas (Yes).
Historically the Kalenjins and Kikuyus are at odds because the former president, Moi, was a Kalenjin, and widely despised after over two decades of rule. When Moi
retired, Kenyans rejoiced by voting opposition party candidate Mwai Kibaki into office in Kenya’s first democratic election. Kibaki won by a landslide in 2002, and the victory restored political power to the Kikuyus. (The Kikuyu Jomo Kenyatta served as the first post-colonial president of Kenya, and was succeeded by then-Vice President Moi after his death.) The odd thing is that even Kalenjins will speak bitterly about Moi, who they feel abandoned his own people while granting political favors to the Kikuyus, who as a tribe have prospered in the last few decades. Supporters of Moi argue that the man is unfairly blamed for the corruption of people he appointed to manage his development projects, most of which collapsed and sent lots of communities into economic ruin.
Um, so I don’t know where I was going with that short political history. There is a lot of tribalism here, and the referendum only put it on display for everyone to see. During pre-service training our Kenyan instructors led a session about tribal stereotypes, which nearly every Kenyan I’ve talked to since has confirmed to be true:
* Kikuyus are all thieves. That’s why Nairobi is so dangerous, because all the Kikuyus moved there and started robbing people.
* Kikuyus are all businessmen. All the shops that aren’t owned by Mwindies
are owned by Kikuyus.
* Mwindies (Indian immigrants and Kenyans descended from Indian immigrants)
are all businessmen. They employ black Kenyans, treat them horribly, make
lots of money and send it all back to India instead of spending it in Kenya
to stimulate the economy.
* Kambas are all witch doctors. The most evil witchcraft is practiced in
Ukambani (land of the Kambas).
* Kamba women are the best lovers. But don’t make them angry because they
will go to a witch doctor and tell them to put a curse on you.
* Maasai are the most brave warriors. They cling stubbornly to their
traditions, still living nomadically and herding cattle and practicing
female genital mutilation.
* Meru men have the worst tempers. They also treat women poorly.
* Kalenjins love milk. This is what makes them the world’s fastest runners.
If you go to a Kalenjin’s house they won’t serve you water, they’ll serve
you milk. If you’re a really special and honored guest they will serve you
sour milk, which has been aged in a hollowed-out gourd and soured with
charcoal. Apparently it’s delicious but looks disgusting.
* Kalenjins are very shy and resistant to outside influence. They tend not
to marry outside their tribe.
* Luhyas love to eat chicken. They have elaborate rules about who gets to
eat what part of the chicken depending on gender, age and occasion.
* Luhyas are very open, hospitable and gregarious people.
* Luos are fishermen. They live around Lake Victoria and trade fish for sex
and spread HIV with their immoral, polygamous, wife-inheriting ways.
* Luos are snobby and materialistic. A Luo may be starving but would rather
spend his next shilling on nice clothes or a TV. They also prefer to speak
English and feel like it’s beneath them to speak Kiswahili.
* Swahili women are the most beautiful in Kenya. Swahili men are all truck
drivers.
* Swahili people are warm and hospitable because they live on the coast and
it’s beautiful there and the area attracts lots of tourists.
* Somalis are despicable refugees.
Electricity is out on the school compound until at least Monday. My neighbor the headmaster told me they forgot to pay the bill. I had the paraffin lamp going for a few hours but it has gotten too cold to leave the windows cracked to prevent carbon monoxide poisoning, so I am lighting my house with my laptop screen.
Well Thanksgiving dinner was a great success and I made enough food to feed everyone I invited, as well as random party crashers and 12 extra kids and housekeepers. We weren’t able to locate a suitable turkey--they’re few and far between in my village and the guy who had one was asking 2500 Ksh for it--so we got two chickens instead, after running around for ten minutes chasing them. I took them aside and said, “Hey buds, I hope you speak English because I don’t know how to say this in Kiswahili. You know, God put you on this earth to be food, so I want to thank you for sacrificing your life for our Thanksgiving dinner. Hillary is good at slaughtering chickens; he’ll be quick and you won’t feel a thing, and I know you’ll taste great, so thank you.” They were Kenyan chickens so I figured they would probably get the God reference. And I didn’t let them down; Hillary was done in five minutes and they were both delicious. The stuffing was also a surprise hit, and everyone was baffled by the idea that you can make pie from a pumpkin.
Menu: butter-herb roasted chickens (2), green beans and carrot julienne in garlic herb vinaigrette, garlic mashed potatoes, autumn spice sweet potatoes, Carolina cole slaw (which I forgot to serve because there was already so much food), Mom’s avocado tomato salad, turkey stuffing sans turkey, chicken giblet gravy, pumpkin pie, no-bake chocolate cookies (Peace Corps recipe).
Speaking of Peace Corps recipes, I found a recipe in the Peace Corps cookbook for making cheese. It says to boil milk with a small piece of cow stomach before aging. It sounded simple enough, until I was told that cows have four stomachs. Now I don’t know which stomach to ask for at the butcher’s, or if it even matters. (On top of that, I always thought that cows had seven stomachs.)
Well as you’ve probably heard, the constitutional referendum went off peacefully and the No/Orange team won by a 15% margin. People say that despite having been conducted peacefully, the referendum has divided the country along tribal lines. President Kibaki, who led the Yes/Banana camp, gracefully conceded victory to his opponents with a big scowl on his face, and the same evening announced that ‘in order to restore cohesiveness’ in his government, he was dissolving his Cabinet, which used to be composed of people from different tribes. A lot of Kenyans suspect the new lineup will be composed mainly of members of his tribe, the Kikuyus, one of the few tribes that voted overwhelmingly for Yes. Campaign rhetoric leading up to the November 21 vote got nasty, with politicians calling each other uncircumcised boys, Satan, and mavu ya kuku (chicken shit). Yes leaders took cheap shots at tribes who supported the No team, and vice versa. One MP from the Yes side described Luos, most of whom supported the No team, as people who ‘hate us because we’re hard-working. Luos just go fishing, and fish is free, and then they ask the government for relief maize to make ugali.’ And pre-referendum clashes tended to occur in towns where tribes who supported opposing teams lived together. In Eldoret there were clashes between Kalenjins (No) and Kikuyus (Yes), while to the east in Burnt Forest there were clashes between Kalenjins (No) and Luhyas (Yes).
Historically the Kalenjins and Kikuyus are at odds because the former president, Moi, was a Kalenjin, and widely despised after over two decades of rule. When Moi
retired, Kenyans rejoiced by voting opposition party candidate Mwai Kibaki into office in Kenya’s first democratic election. Kibaki won by a landslide in 2002, and the victory restored political power to the Kikuyus. (The Kikuyu Jomo Kenyatta served as the first post-colonial president of Kenya, and was succeeded by then-Vice President Moi after his death.) The odd thing is that even Kalenjins will speak bitterly about Moi, who they feel abandoned his own people while granting political favors to the Kikuyus, who as a tribe have prospered in the last few decades. Supporters of Moi argue that the man is unfairly blamed for the corruption of people he appointed to manage his development projects, most of which collapsed and sent lots of communities into economic ruin.
Um, so I don’t know where I was going with that short political history. There is a lot of tribalism here, and the referendum only put it on display for everyone to see. During pre-service training our Kenyan instructors led a session about tribal stereotypes, which nearly every Kenyan I’ve talked to since has confirmed to be true:
* Kikuyus are all thieves. That’s why Nairobi is so dangerous, because all the Kikuyus moved there and started robbing people.
* Kikuyus are all businessmen. All the shops that aren’t owned by Mwindies
are owned by Kikuyus.
* Mwindies (Indian immigrants and Kenyans descended from Indian immigrants)
are all businessmen. They employ black Kenyans, treat them horribly, make
lots of money and send it all back to India instead of spending it in Kenya
to stimulate the economy.
* Kambas are all witch doctors. The most evil witchcraft is practiced in
Ukambani (land of the Kambas).
* Kamba women are the best lovers. But don’t make them angry because they
will go to a witch doctor and tell them to put a curse on you.
* Maasai are the most brave warriors. They cling stubbornly to their
traditions, still living nomadically and herding cattle and practicing
female genital mutilation.
* Meru men have the worst tempers. They also treat women poorly.
* Kalenjins love milk. This is what makes them the world’s fastest runners.
If you go to a Kalenjin’s house they won’t serve you water, they’ll serve
you milk. If you’re a really special and honored guest they will serve you
sour milk, which has been aged in a hollowed-out gourd and soured with
charcoal. Apparently it’s delicious but looks disgusting.
* Kalenjins are very shy and resistant to outside influence. They tend not
to marry outside their tribe.
* Luhyas love to eat chicken. They have elaborate rules about who gets to
eat what part of the chicken depending on gender, age and occasion.
* Luhyas are very open, hospitable and gregarious people.
* Luos are fishermen. They live around Lake Victoria and trade fish for sex
and spread HIV with their immoral, polygamous, wife-inheriting ways.
* Luos are snobby and materialistic. A Luo may be starving but would rather
spend his next shilling on nice clothes or a TV. They also prefer to speak
English and feel like it’s beneath them to speak Kiswahili.
* Swahili women are the most beautiful in Kenya. Swahili men are all truck
drivers.
* Swahili people are warm and hospitable because they live on the coast and
it’s beautiful there and the area attracts lots of tourists.
* Somalis are despicable refugees.
posted by Justina at 2:15 PM
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