Bananaless in Kisumu

Mailbag: Asante sana Elise, Eric and Amy! Who says letter-writing is a lost art? Just want y'all to know that Nigel puking all over Amy's floor made my co-worker laugh like I've never seen him laugh, which just goes to show that dogs make the best cross-cultural ambassadors. That same co-worker's face lights up everytime he sees Christian messages on my mail - especially Elise's dead Christ on the cross. I have to stop bursting his bubble by explaining that my friends are just being sacriligious. Also asante sana to Patrick for a THIRD bag of peanut M&Ms, teabags
(Earl Grey is paradise in English breakfast tea country) and sample shampoos.


So it's another weekend escape to the big city for email, cold beer and fried chicken. Also I'm looking forward to washing my hair, a chore that I've started putting off for places where water comes out of the wall above your head. And I've been instructed not to eat bananas while I'm here in Kisumu unless I want to be stoned by an angry crowd. Why? Because the whole country is fiercely divided on the upcoming consitutional referendum, which Kenyans will get to vote on on November 21. Hm, sounds a little like...Iraq?

Anyway, NARC, the ruling party led by President Kibaki, has drafted a new constitution that supposedly contains a multitude of reforms designed to crack down on corruption. In reality the new constitution is just as disappointing as the old one, containing hundred of new and controversial propositions that make it impossible for a reasonable voter to agree with the entire document. Yet voters only have two choices: Yes, adopt the new constitution, or No, reject it and keep the existing one whose contents suck so much that it was the reason people demanded the constitutional redraft in the first place. Like in Iraq, there was a big uproar about a month ago because it looked like the government wasn't going to make the draft publicly available and people would end up voting for something they had never even read. But Kenya came through eventually, distributing copies to even remote rural constituencies like mine, and they are even offering "civic education" classes to educate the masses about what's in the draft.

Oh, yeah, bananas. So the various members of Parliament and other politicians have already begun campaigning across the country to gain support for their side. Those that want to vote Yes have adopted the banana as their symbol, while the Nos have adopted the orange. At campaing rallies people wave the fruit corresponding to the side they support. My friend Mugah said, "Look at how silly we Africans are. Bananas and oranges of all things." I didn't tell him that AMericans use elephants and donkeys. Anyway, Kisumu is a heavily No camp (oranges) and rumors abound that people here have already been stoned for eating bananas in public, and that banana vendors are being driven out of town by No supporters. The matatu that I took into town this morning had an orange skewered to the windshield wiper, and we got held up by a bunch of MPs (members of Parliament) holding a No rally in Chavakali (about 30 minutes outside of Kisumu). I've been advised not to eat either bananas or oranges while I'm here, and I'm expecting that tensions will only rise as the referendum date nears. Fortunately I live in the bush, where it's easy to hide out from mad crowds and quietly farm chickens instead. Hex! Hex!